CENTRAL. There's a another South Park controversy underway. Read
about it here
to see if they've come clean yet about what's going on in the network
There's one perspective we have to mention. Think of all those
"irreverent" Comedy Central shows -- the foul-mouthed,
anti-establishment comedians, the endless reruns of T&A-drenched
teen sex movies, the smugly satirical political send-ups that always
seem to feel brave for slinging feces (cleverly packaged perhaps, but
always feces under the wrapping) at the President and his allies -- and
ask yourself how hard and edgy and fearless it is to mock only those
things which are traditional, grown-up, or somehow inconvenient (say,
duty and honor) to a selfish, half-educated adolescent. Not very.
Comedy Central isn't edgy, fearless, or even witty. It's crass and
exploitative, and it's no surprise that its management lacks even a
nihilist's sense of principle. The so-called comedy network is nothing
BUT crap, and we mean that in the most literal, South- Park connotation
of the word.
Not quite as huge as the Newark, DE,
protest, but a good turnout for Salem
LEGACY. I won't
make any bones about it. I thought my coverage of the Salem County
Illegal Immigration March was going to be the splashiest in the
southern New Jersey-Delaware region. Imagine my disappointment when I
discovered via Instapundit
that we'd been upstaged by Newark,
If you look at the map, you can see why Salem and Newark might be
I should have realized, probably, that Newark's status as a university
town makes it a lot easier for them to hit the magic dozen mark when it
comes to assembling protesters in a great cause like this one. Even so,
the startling scale of the Newark march drained a lot of the verve out
of this report. But here goes anyway.
The protest organization meeting was scheduled for Sunday morning in
the Salem Oak Diner, which sits across the street from the highly
symbolic Salem Oak, the tree under which the county's first Quaker
immigrants signed a treaty with the Indians in 1675. Unfortunately for
the ambiance of the current assembly, that treaty was one of a handful
ever signed with the Indians that was actually honored. Maybe that's
why the organizational meeting was so subdued.
An atmosphere of calm prevailed at
As it happened, I didn't encounter
Carlos at the meeting but later, outside the diner (see above) when
he initiated the march through Salem's downtown section. I had the
opportunity to interview him at some length, since other media seemed
less eager to get too close to the protest activity. While not actually
an immigrant, Carlos Harris, 34, of Cowtown, has an
interesting story to tell. His family is mostly Scotch-Irish stock, but
Carlos's mother visited Texas once with her cattleman grandfather and
had a brief dalliance with a Brahma bull rider named -- you guessed it
-- Carlos. Nothing came of the romance because Carlos was deported to
Mexico after an obscure incident involving some toxic homemade tequila,
but when the young lady got married some years later, her husband
always teased her about her Mexican boyfriend, which made her so
furious over time that she defiantly (and still under the influence of
the epidural) named her firstborn son after the long lost rodeo rider.
Carlos explained that his mother doesn't get around very well anymore,
so he decided to join the protest on her behalf. Her position is that
the idea of a wall along the border isn't very friendly and should be
more like a fence, maybe with some broken glass on top.
The actual march was peaceful and lacking in serious confrontations.
Once, a car approached Star Corner, the town's main intersection, while
Carlos was demonstrating there, but it turned right and Carlos assured
me he never felt threatened.
A moment of near-collision between
traffic and the protest at Star Corner.
The remainder of the event was, well,
uneventful. Carlos proceeded the additional block up Market Street to
the County Courthouse, where a friend had promised to come by and give
him a ride back to Cowtown. I would have stayed till the ride came, but
it was almost time to feed the dogs and I had to go. I snapped one last
picture as I was driving away.
The climax of the march at the
"Adios, Carlos," I yelled.
"What?" he replied.
And I guess I'll leave it at that.
I see that other bloggers, especially Michelle Malkin,
are still trying to publish the flashiest and most sensational protest
coverage they can find. This is kind of an insult to small town
activists everywhere. We do the best we can. With what we have. So don't
be such a snob about it, okay?
The Newark blogger has now penned a completely slighting entry about
the Salem protest in support of illegal immigration. He says I'm
"making excuses," but what could I have done, short of making up a much
larger demonstration that didn't occur in fact? Like my role models at
the New York Times, I am
simply an impartial journalist who makes up the bare minimum of news
necessary to inflate my sense of self-importance virtue.
should learn from my outstanding (if I dare say so myself) example. And
if he ever ventures over the bridge into OUR territory, he should bear
in mind that we're not a bunch of college radical pussies here, but
centuries worth of inbred gene pools that would scare the hell out of Ward
. The good news is that students in American public
schools who can't identify countries like France, Italy, and Spain on
the map needn't worry about it any longer (if they ever did). Here's
the new map. Spain's been off it ever since they caved in to Islamist
extortion and voted in an appeasement government after 3/11. The French
have been flailing in the water since the government found it couldn't
stand up to a bunch of ghetto muslim punks who burn cars for fun, and
they finally slipped under the waves this week when the government
proved it couldn't stand up to a bunch of lazy, spoiled university
brats who burn
cars to demonstrate their qualifications to hold lifelong jobs. Italy's
gone too, sunk in a night and a day like Atlantis, as a once proud
nation signed up for a program of anti-American rhetoric and craven
appeasement of barbarians.
The bad news is, if you really really hate war, this is the worst
possible news. For explanation, we could direct you to two excellent
essays (h/t InstaPundit), one by Charles
Krauthammer and one by Daniel
Johnson, but we won't do that. Instead, we'll leave you with one
stanza from a poem
by the great Irishman William Butler Yeats:
Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the center cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
now the scientists are announcing new dinosaurs at a pretty rapid rate
again. Most recently, we got this:
What's 7 feet tall, 13 feet long, armed
with sickle-like claws and covered with feathers? Hagryphus giganteus,
the new raptor dinosaur discovered in southern Utah.
The dinosaur was unveiled this week in a pair of press conferences held
by the Utah Museum of Natural History, one on Monday in Escalante, near
its discovery site, and the other on Tuesday in the museum on the
University of Utah campus...
The name means "giant four-footed, bird-like god of the western
desert," said Lindsay Zanno, a graduate student at the U. who named it
and is the lead author of a paper describing the animal. The paper was
published in the Journal of Vertebrate Paleontology.
Only about 7 percent of the fossil was recovered, said Scott Sampson,
the museum's chief curator. That consisted of hand and feet bones,
including the impression of the sharp keratin sheath that was curved
like a huge cat's claw.
All they have of it is hand and leg bones, but they know it had
feathers. They know it had feathers?
Does anybody else suspect that the scientists are just playing with us
now? For some reason they got tired of the reptile dinosaurs and
decided they were really birds instead. So they start giving us
pictures like the one above, all nicely colored in and adorned with
poultry-like cartilage crowns, which, of course, they have recovered exactly none of.
I think they're laughing. I think they're going to see just how far
they can go with this made up crap until somebody notices that the
whole thing is a Confidencegameius
Giganticus, which is paleontology
In the meantime I expect we'll see additional exciting announcements of
new 'dinosaurs' like the two below.
It's just not working for me. I miss the old romping, stomping
'terrible lizards.' I don't want them to be just chickens the size of
airliners. What does anybody else think?
Are you ready, America? Here's our new national mommy. Her name is Meredith
Vereira, and she's the one who's going to be shouting 'Rise and
shine' at us every weekday morning on the Today Show. Like me, I know you're
hoping that she'll be a good mommy, filled with hatred for all things
Republican and Christian and filled with love for all things
saccharine, socialist, female, and paranoiacally child-related. With any
luck she'll share Katie's certainty that George Bush is destroying the
country, that Islam means 'Peace,' that Maya Angelou is a greater poet
than T. S. Eliot, and that the definition of good journalism is smiling
sweetly while while you ask hostile and unfair questions of those who
with your moronic assumptions about matters of politics, culture,
religion, and the raising of undisciplined psychopaths.
We don't doubt she's equipped with the uniquely female stamina for
interminable discussions about child seats in cars and the ineradicable
genetic flaws of men. But does she also have the requisite perky
narcissism to show off her colonoscopy,
breast cancer exam, pap smear, and home pregnancy test on live TV while
we're all trying to eat breakfast? And does she have the balls to keep
Matt Lauer in his assigned place as NBC's eunuch-in-chief? Only time
will tell, but you've got
to admit she's got the hips for it.
As for the old Katie, well, we hope her first year's salary is
strato-huge-ic, because when she sits her big ass down in that anchor
chair, it's the last time anyone will ever lay eyes on her. The
news is bad enough as it is. When it's being read to us by an aged elf
with a series of impenetrable grudges against the country that made her
a gazillionaire, it's unwatchable.
. To understand the context of this event, go here
and make sure to read the Update.
Got it? Good. We're looking for the member of the GOP leadership who
would be best in the role of Tuco from The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.
Entries should be written in the Comments section of InstaPunk or
emailed to the address shown elsewhere on this page. They should be
funny, witty, or otherwise amusing.
If nothing is funny, witty, or amusing, we won't report. If you are,
we'll be laudatory. That's the prize.