It's a common misconception that punks are young. The first punk rockers showed up in the Seventies. Fed up with everything, including the 'Revolution' and the Radical Sixties. That's who we are. Not all of us are old, but the conventions and traditions we despise are old. American leftism hasn't had a new idea since it started hiding in the environmentalist movement after the fall of the Soviet Union. We're more fed up and angry with the left than most of you twenty-somethings could ever get with the right even after a night of posting at DailyKos on ecstasy and coke.

We welcome you to come here and do battle. But when you do, be prepared for the fact that we'll ridicule your knowledge of history, grammar, spelling, culture, rhetoric, and debate. Even the young ones in our troupe are Old School. We'll laugh at your obscenities, poke holes in your unoriginal sixties politics, and generally amuse ourselves at your expense if you come on as aggressive feminists, save the planet Greengobs, or sanctimonious atheist hyper-intellectuals.

The same goes for NewMedia conservatives. If you're bad writers, one-issue drumbeaters, glory hounds, or pretentious half-educated blogstars, we'll kill you.

You can comment at will. We're one of a mere handful of sites on the Internet that don't screen comments before we post them. You have freedom of speech here. And we have freedom of retaliation. And we don't give one single, solitary shit what you think of us. But whatever you think of us, our opinion of critics is worse.

We've been called elitists, racists, sexists, and creationists. We're none of those things. What we are is honest. We talk about things no one else has the guts to, especially if they're planning a career in what is called the new media -- meaning the same old windbags showing up for 50-second shout-fests on cable news channels. You won't find us there. You'll find us here. Saying what we think. A lot of you won't like us. Great. We don't like you much either. We're punks. Mostly smarter than you and definitely better informed on practically everything than you.

We're libertarians.And conservatives. And radicals. We live outside of all your pigeonholes. We like Mozart's Concerto for Clarinet and Oboe, the Rolling Stones (all), Triumph motorcycles, P-51 Mustangs, Hookercraft speedboats, Frank Lloyd Wright, Edward Hopper, Matisse, and Picasso, Rimbaud, Ettore Bugatti, the Island of the White Peacocks, W.O. Bentley, the Jersey Shore, Jimmy Stewart, quantum physics, Philadelphia's statue of William Penn, Louis Armstrong, the Blue Angels, Don Garlits, F,. Scott Fitzgerald, Monaco, Placido Domingo and Mario Lanza, Fritz Lang, Orson Welles, Mark Twain, Alexandre Dumas (pere), Oscar Wilde, farm fairs, Cuda Hemis, the Champs Elysee, the Clash, Rachmaninoff, Chopin, Voltaire, Richard Petty, Benny Goodman, Dante, Jaguar XKEs, northern Italy, Alfred Hitchcock, broadway shows, Stirling Moss, Miles Davis, Austin Healey 3000s, 'Nessun Dorma,' Rita Hayworth, Richard Byrd's "Alone," George Gershwin, the street markets of Hong Kong, Bill Evans, Harvard-Yale, Baudelaire, Fred Astaire and Cyd Charisse, rodeo, Mallarme's translations of Edgar Allen Poe, Frank Sinatra, Ohio State-Michigan, the red roofs of Bogota, Ernest Hemingway (up to a point), St. Thomas Aquinas, GNR, the Chrysler Building, Hedy Lamarr, Muhammed Ali, St. Augustine, Bullitt, Winston Churchill, Eminem, Humphrey Bogart, the view from the Rainbow Room, Dostoevsky's Grand Inquisitor, Groton, the back roads of Ohio, Shakespearean Sonnets, Doris Day, the X-Games, the Gospel of John, the hills of San Francisco, Robert E. Lee & Ulysses Grant, Cary Grant, Beowulf, Lake Como, the Aenead, greyhounds, Die Hard, cats, Ducatis, Denzel Washington, the bridges of Portland OR, Verlaine, the United States Marines, and The Last of the Mohicans. We're also unintimidated by Richard Dawkins, fascinated by the Saturn moon Iapetus, and wide open to the possibilities of quantum computing and probable universes. Though we think George Nouri should be put in solitary confinement for the rest of his natural life. Got us figured out yet?

Sort it all out for yourselves. Before you sail in with your superior comments Whatever you think, you don't KNOW us. Bear that in mind.

-- R. F. Laird.